Breathe In | Breathe Out

I wonder what your hopes, dreams, and plans are for the year that lies ahead… I wonder if you’ll dare to dream beyond the comfort of familiarity and self imposed restraints…

I hope you do…I hope I do too…

But first, let us exhale the year we are leaving behind. Let us, collectively, breathe out the mistakes, sorrows, pains, and regrets of the year we leave behind. May we spend time reflecting on the ups and the downs…

So often people say they have no regrets. While I understand living with a forward thinking mindset, I’m skeptical of the idea we can fully enjoy and embrace life without any acknowledgment of our errors and losses. As I look back over the course of my life I have many regrets. I’ve lied, cheated, stolen, and hurt. I’ve been unapologetic and unforgiving; I’ve said hurtful things and gossiped freely. I’ve been exclusive and arrogant. I’ve been selfish. I’ve caused people I love pain and grief. And the truth is, this list could go on for days… I do my best, most of the time, but I am flawed.

I have many regrets. I’ve learned in order to move forward and refine my character, I have to do a few things:

  1. Offer sincere apologies when necessary

2. Acknowledge and take responsibility when I make a poor decision

3. Be willing to give myself grace and accept it from others.

I cannot do better without first acknowledging an error and I cannot do better without letting it go, at some point.

2015 was an incredible year for me. Incredibly high, highs and incredibly low, lows. I’ve experienced grief on a deep, profound level and I’ve experienced joy on a euphoric, magical, unicorn-esque level (hello JOY!). I’ll close out this year with a spirit of contentment and high hopes for the future; that I will do better and be better. I will carry grief and joy with me into the seasons ahead. I will never be free from grief or joy; both are gifts I’ll treasure.

It’s difficult for me to leap into a new year, but it’s thrilling as well. I’m ready. Regret will always be a part of life but so will grace… Breathe out last years regrets. Make amends; find and give peace. Breathe in the hope of a new year…

I’ve got to go…I have people to love and serve, I have new adventures to take on, and a momma to honor in the 365 days+ that lie ahead…

Some favorite moments of 2015…

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